Showing results by narrator "Sarah Pesek" in All Categories

We’ve all dreamed of ditching everything and running off to another country—but almost no one actually ever does. Well, Val feels like she's almost no one. Invisible to her husband and dissatisfied with her life, deep in her soul Val yearns to be someone else. Someone sexy. Someone happy. So she buys a ticket and takes off to Italy, with only her favorite romance novel to guide her.

Growing up in backwoods Florida, Bobbie Drex has seen it all – from two-headed turtles to two-timing boyfriends. Her life of hard knocks has left her short on cash, but she’s still packing enough snark to give any whack-job a run for his money. Or so she thinks. But when a mysterious stranger arrives at her mechanic shop seeking repairs to his rundown RV, suddenly it’s Bobbie who’s in for a complete overhaul... Norman Bates in a turban. Gonadal twins. Mothman pooper-scoopers.

Doreen Diller wants to be a movie star. But after 15 years of failed auditions, she’s yet to garner a single callback from a Hollywood producer. Determined to hit the big time before she turns 40, she pins her hopes on a job assisting soap opera heartthrob Tad Longmire. He could be the answer to her dreams—or the beginning of her nightmares. While filming a new TV series starring Tad, a stabbing death rocks the set. Unfortunately for Doreen, the role of murder suspect is finally one she appears ideally suited to play.

After being duped out of her life savings in Germany, Val Fremden retreats home to Florida with more than just her pride in tatters. Broke, jobless, divorced, and 45, she knows starting over won’t be easy. But when her only friend suddenly turns up dead, Val begins to wonder if the world is out to get her.

What better place than the Sunshine State for dark souls to live out their golden years? After all, who would notice? Uh, Bobbie and Grayson, of course. As a rogue physicist turned conspiracy chaser, Grayson's motto is: Have sentience, will travel. As a broke, private-eye wannabe, Bobbie doesn't have much choice but to follow his sketchy command. But every road Grayson travels down leads to the bizarre, the unexplained, and taco-induced heartburn. Vampires. Zombiguanas. Ikigai smell. Its hard to decide which is scarier!

Could it possibly get any worse than having absolutely no magical abilities when you’re a member of the most powerful family of witches ever? It used to be that I’d say no, but then I keep getting set up on dates with Gil Connolly whose hotness is only matched by his ego. Seriously. I can’t stand him. Even if I also can’t stop thinking about him (specifically kissing him) but we’re going to pretend I never told you that part.

It’s moving day for Val. And, as usual, anything that can go wrong does - beginning with her new boyfriend, Tom. When he shows up at her doorstep with an unwelcome delivery, Val becomes the unwitting center of attention for a whole new world of weirdos…whose antics could pin Val for human dismemberment. Plagued with a hot cop on her tail and a mean one on her trail, Val is forced to turn to old friends and new ones in her attempt to point the finger of blame on somebody else. But when an unexpected witness identifies Val as the guilty party, it may be time for her to skip town.

When Bobbie and Grayson head back to Plant City to help out some old friends, they run into a “hole” new set of problems. While investigating a rash of missing persons, it’s not long before they get under each other’s skin. What’s making them all hot and bothered? Each other. In more ways than one. Bobbie’s down-to-earth explanations for the missing men irritate Grayson, while his otherworldly theories have her itching for a sane solution. But when new, conflicting evidence emerges in the case, they soon realize they’ve only scratched the surface of the mystery at hand.

Val Fremden is a lot of things. Quirky. Jaded. Disaster-prone—to name a few. But more than anything, she’s afraid of commitment. So it's no wonder that when boyfriend Tom tells her he loves her, Val plays it cool. But when he accidently hauls her mom’s ashes to a junkyard, Val loses it like Chernobyl 2.0. On the warpath with Tom, Val turns to her wacko, low-rent friends to help track down her mom’s cremains. But three botched stakeouts and two disasters later, she still hasn't got peanuts.

Val’s always been unlucky at love—and a whole bunch of other things. But she’s never actually felt cursed. Until now. When Tom gives Val an engagement ring for her 50th birthday, she wants to fly the coop. But it’s Tom who skips out on the romantic getaway he planned. When he can’t make the trip, one of Val’s pals goes instead. On the first day, her friend entangles Val in a prank that ticks off the wrong tourist. On the second day, she gets Val charged with murder. Did I mention Val was unlucky?

Still on the run from the long arm of the law, Helen Hawthorne has found employment as a maid at Fort Lauderdale’s Full Moon Hotel, picking up after clueless tourists and keeping her head down. But staying discreet gets a bit more difficult when Helen opens the hotel dumpster and discovers the dead body of a fellow hotel employee. Then a hotel guest is murdered in the shower, and Helen’s no-good ex-husband Rob arrives in town in search of the money the court said he deserves.

At the Pampered Pet Boutique in Fort Lauderdale, the wealthy owners need a muzzle more than their beloved pets. On her way to deliver a freshly groomed Yorkie, Helen discovers client Tammie Grimsby stabbed to death with a pair of grooming scissors. As Helen sniffs around both the boutique and a growing list of pure breed suspects, she knows that her bark will have to be worse than her bite if she’s going to put the collar on a killer.

Miguel Angel’s chic salon is where Fort Lauderdale’s high society hairdos get done. Even though Helen Hawthorne is just a gofer at the upscale salon, she has to admit the fabulous Miguel Angel is a master at the craft of coif. But with great heads of hair come great headaches. Especially when Miguel Angel and Helen try to prepare the pregnant fiancée of Kingman "King" Oden for her nuptials. King is a bloated, loudmouth bully with a gossip blog, a TV show, and a lousy attitude.

Val knows she can’t solve all the world’s problems, so she’s settled on two: smashing every tacky figurine on the planet…and ridding the universe of her boyfriend’s hideous vinyl recliner.

When Val’s forced to take up dog-sitting as a second career, she runs into one tiny snag. She’s afraid of dogs. In fact, the only thing she’s more afraid of is Tom moving in and wrecking her Sweatpants Saturdays. With neighbor Laverne facing the same impending doom, the two women decide sabotage is the perfect solution to change the plans of their cohabitation-minded boyfriends. But their scheme soon gets sidetracked when a swarthy guy with a shady past moves in next door and neighborhood dogs start disappearing.

The Superior Club is where Fort Lauderdale’s wealthiest - and snobbiest - come to play. But for Helen Hawthorne, it’s all work and no play. As a customer care clerk, it’s her job to cater to the clients’ every little whim and take care of their every little problem.

When Val tries to revive her old writing career, story ideas prove as elusive as a moment alone without her boyfriend Tom breathing down her neck. Tom’s moved in, and Val’s itching to move out–at least temporarily. A last-minute getaway to the country seems like the perfect solution for dissolving her writer’s block. But a fateful fish fry ends up inspiring a whole different kind of dead end.

All Val Fremden wanted was a quiet holiday away from her oddball family. But that just ain’t gonna happen. When Val and her boyfriend arrive at her mother’s “country estate” in Hicksville, Florida, the annual family fruitcake competition is well underway. And there’s more than a few fruits and nuts in the running.

After all she’s endured with her own marriage, divorce, and subsequent flight from alimony, Helen Hawthorne getting a job at Millicent’s Bridal Salon is ironic in the extreme. The newest client is Kiki, a wealthy witch who’s making her daughter's wedding day all about Kiki. When Kiki is found smothered to death with her daughter’s wedding dress, the cops seem to think Helen is responsible. Now, Helen must prove her innocence before the bride and groom read their wedding vows—and the police read Helen her rights.

Still living under the radar in Fort Lauderdale due to her refusal to pay her ex-husband’s spousal support, Helen Hawthorne’s latest workaday job might just be the lowest rung on the employment ladder - telemarketing. While Helen is conducting a phone survey with the wealthy Henry “Hank” Asporth, Helen is convinced she heard a murder being committed. With no solid proof, Helen is driven to find out what really happened with Hank and the mystery woman. But if she’s not careful, she just might end up holding a dead line of her own.