Showing results by author "Rick Gualtieri" in All Categories

My name’s Tim McAvoy. I was a mid-level software manager from suburbia until the day I caught my wife with another man. I thought our divorce was the worst fate imaginable. But then I met my end at the grill of a speeding bus, only to realize I didn’t have a clue. Whisked away at the moment of my death to a dimension beyond time and space, I now find myself an unwilling contestant in a multiversal game where brutal bloodshed is considered entertainment. My only chance to get my life back is to win.

My name's Tamara Bentley, and I should be happy to be heading home for the holidays. Too bad tensions between the supernatural forces surrounding my hometown are at an all-time high - witches and werewolves, ancient enemies who would happily slaughter each other. One side fears me, the other doesn't know I exist, and I aim to keep it that way, lest they both decide to find common ground in killing me.

The collection begins with "The Ghost of Hooker Alley," which introduces listeners to 10-year-old Sarah and six-year-old Tommy. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, Sarah and Tommy think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley.... "The Monkey's Penis" features Chris, a teenage boy who receives a birthday gift unlike any other. In "Gary's Children," a man's quest for stress relief leads to terror, and an unexpected kidnapping takes place in "Aliens Wrecked Our Kegger."

My name is Tamara Bentley, "Bent" to my friends, and I'm not supposed to exist. I was born of the forbidden union between a witch and a werewolf, and they've been trying their damnedest to hide my existence ever since. But now my secret is out, and my uncle, the leader of the wolf pack, is pissed beyond belief. In his eyes, I'm something that should've never been born. He wants me dead and doesn't care who he has to sacrifice to get the job done.

Gamer, geek, and vampire – Bill Ryder was a normal guy who's now trying to survive in a world of abnormal horrors. Despite awesome powers and a Brooklyn-sized attitude, the odds are stacked heavily against him. Bill must fulfill his destiny and save the world from the ancient terrors threatening it – all while trying to build some semblance of a social life.

My name’s Bill Ryder and I’m having a hell of a week. Magic is back, my new roommate is a blob of yellow snot, and my friend Sally has been entombed alive in solid rock. Oh, and I’m dead again, or undead anyway. Life’s not quite finished taking a dump on me yet, because now something is hunting vampires in New York City. A smarmy-ass wizard has been called in to investigate – one who’s got a closet full of skeletons and eyes for my girlfriend.

My name's Tamara Bentley and lately everything I touch turns to crap. My best friend is missing, I was forced to kill my favorite aunt...oh, and my parents have been kidnapped by the queen of the fairies. It's enough to give a person a complex. There's no time to drown my sorrows, though. I've got two warring factions to contend with. Neither the witches nor the werewolves like me, much less respect me, but somehow I need to rally them to my cause if I'm to have any chance of rescuing my parents.

My name’s Bill Ryder and, oddly enough, my lack of heartbeat is probably the least concerning thing in my life. My witch girlfriend has been marked for death by a vampire temptress who wants me for herself. With both sides spoiling for a fight, the chances of them talking out their problems over lunch are slim. While I’d love to help smooth things over, I’ve been way too distracted dealing with evil leprechauns and redneck werewolves.

Tamara Bentley thought rescuing her parents from the fairy queen would be enough—that she could go back to college and resume her life. Pity for her that reality has other plans, especially since it's on the verge of collapsing. Demonic entities are destroying the portals linking Earth to the multiverse. When the last one falls, all life as we know it will end. Sadly, with each connection severed, the supernatural beings of our world grow weaker. As their power fades, so too does their chances of stopping this cataclysm once and for all.

Tantor Audio presents six must-listen stories from the horror comedy series Shingles.... Shingles Audio Collection Volume 2 begins with "Terror on Hypo Beach", in which a family vacation turns out to be anything but ordinary. In "Put Your Hand in My Ass", Will needs a mentor for the upcoming high school talent show. What he gets is Sloppy - an enchanted puppet with weird sexual proclivities and an extremely problematic approach to comedy.

My name’s Bill Ryder and five years ago I saved the world, banishing magic and monsters to the shadows. Not bad for a game programmer from New York. Anyway, I thought it was over, that I was done with all that supernatural crap. Too bad shit's about to get surreal again. Now the impossible has happened. My goddaughter is conjuring fireballs from thin air and two vampires have shown up at my doorstep looking to kick my ass.

Upon the shores of an ancient sea in a long-forgotten land, the slaves of Kel - the city of tears - cried out for a hero, one who would save them from their tormented existence. What they got was Silas Kane, the most inept paladin to ever defile a holy symbol. Raised by insane monks, he’s out to spread the love of his god whether or not anyone wants it. With a high tolerance for pain and a dump stat in intelligence, Silas is on a quest to end the suffering of those in need - one way or the other.

Watching my friends die was hard. Getting blown up right after was even worse. But that's nothing compared to waking up to the mother I never knew and finding out she's a monster far worse than anything I've faced so far. Now, not only is she trying to set me up with every eligible demon between here and Hades, but she's busy plotting the demise of my best friend Gary—setting us up on a collision course for a battle to the death. All I want is to escape her clutches and get back to my life, but with a supernatural war brewing that might not be possible.

Nobody likes getting bullied, and Donny has had enough. Deciding to take matters into his own hands, he solicits the help of the old Asian man at the end of his street to teach him Karate. During a grueling two days of training, Donny earns belt after belt, until he finally becomes a Karate Master.

For over 30 years, I've prowled the night as one of the undead. I've walked among you—a wolf in sheep's clothing—doing unspeakable things, killing countless people.

My name is Jessie Flores and I thought I was done being jerked around by witches, dryads, and gods in my quest to become a real-life superhero. Turns out they were just getting started. My father's been kidnapped, a handsome vampire with a shady past won't stop shadowing me, and my best friend's family is actively trying to kill him. Fixing all of that won't be easy, though, since I've been cursed to complete 13 divine trials, while a newb fury haunts my every step. If I fail, I'll die. If I hesitate, my friends will suffer instead.

"Stranger's Thing" by Robert Bevan: Four friends get more than they bargained for when they break into a seemingly abandoned research lab. "The Shingling" by Steve Wetherell: Johnny Terry, a recovering meth addict, is excited to start his new life as the caretaker at the Underpass Motel. Unfortunately, the Underpass is haunted by the ghosts of dead porn stars. "The Haunting of Whore House" by Robert Bevan: Lucy and her brother, Junkie, find out that moving was only the beginning of their troubles when they encounter the ghost of a little boy in the woods. Plus three more!

Imagine going to bed with mousy brown locks and waking up with a headful of supernova scarlet. It's a hot new look for me - literally, because it bursts into flames whenever I'm threatened. My magical makeover is all Gary's fault. I knew there was something off from the moment he transferred to my school. Go figure. He's a wizard with a trust fund and an inferiority complex. Now, thanks to him, I've graduated from high school bullies to supernatural terrors and that's not all. Fate has chosen me to face the legendary vampire destined to destroy the world.

Shingles Audio Collection, Volume 4 begins with "Carnival of Psychos". In this story, Richie Spoonerman finds himself being chased by a psychotic clown in the Maze of Mirrors at the carnival. In "That Time of the Month", Molly Stein's life was hard enough before she started noticing some weird changes. For one, a suspicious number of people seem to be exploding around her. Plus much more!

My name’s Bill Ryder and, despite being a legendary creature of the night, I’m not having the best of days. My girlfriend is trapped in another dimension, my apartment’s being staked out by werewolves, and to top it all off I’m flat freaking broke. Too bad there’s no rest for the wicked. Monstrous beasts of biblical proportions have been unleashed upon the world, leaving me with a mighty big question. How the hell is one poor-ass vamp supposed to stop something the size of a battleship?