I Never Said I Loved You cover art

I Never Said I Loved You

 Preview
LIMITED TIME OFFER

3 months free
Try for £0.00
£8.99/mo thereafter. Renews automatically. Terms apply. Offer ends 31 July 2025 at 23:59 GMT.
Pick 1 audiobook a month from our unmatched collection.
Listen all you want to thousands of included audiobooks, Originals, and podcasts.
Access exclusive sales and deals.
Premium Plus auto-renews for £8.99/mo after 3 months. Cancel monthly.

I Never Said I Loved You

By: Rhik Samadder
Narrated by: Rhik Samadder
Try for £0.00

£8.99/mo after 3 months. Offer ends 31 July 2025 23:59 GMT. Cancel monthly.

Buy Now for £12.99

Buy Now for £12.99

Confirm Purchase
Pay using card ending in
Switch payment method
By completing your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and authorise Audible to charge your designated card or any other card on file. Please see our Privacy Notice, Cookies Notice and Interest-based Ads Notice.
Cancel

About this listen

'I'm in bed with my mother, in a Bangkok sex hotel. It is my 30th birthday, it is time for me to become a man, and I have grave worries about the kind of man I'm going to become.'

On an unlikely backpacking trip, Rhik and his mother find themselves speaking openly for the first time in years. Afterwards, the depression that has weighed down on Rhik begins to loosen its grip for a moment - so he seizes the opportunity: to own it, to understand it and to find out where it came from.

Through this begins a journey of investigation, healing and recovery. Along the way Rhik learns some shocking truths about his family and realises that, in turn, he will need to confront the secrets he has long buried. But through this, he triumphs over his fears and brings his depression into the light.

I Never Said I Loved You is the story of how Rhik learned to let go and then keep going. With unique humour and honesty, he has created a powerfully rich, funny and poignant exploration of the light and dark in all of us.

©2019 Rhik Samadder (P)2019 Headline Publishing Group Ltd Funny Feel-Good Heartfelt Inspiring Thought-Provoking Witty Health Mental Health

Listeners also enjoyed...

 From the Oasthouse: The Alan Partridge Podcast (Series 1) cover art
Glutton cover art
Ancestors cover art
David and Ameena cover art
On Hampstead Heath cover art
Hands cover art
I Wanna Be Yours cover art
How We Love cover art
Growing Up Disabled in Australia cover art
Will You Read This, Please? cover art
My Beautiful Psychosis: Making Sense of Madness cover art
Cold Fish Soup cover art
Are We Home Yet? cover art
The Reluctant Carer cover art
A Short History of Falling cover art
It's Not OK to Feel Blue (and Other Lies) cover art
All stars
Most relevant  
An emotionally adept and incredibly funny memoir. I thought it was truly beautiful. Rhik writes and performs the book perfectly so that the book never falls into saccharine wistfulness even though he does express earnestly some very heartfelt messages. It is also very funny in parts and made me laugh out on several occasions. I wholeheartedly recommend it

Beautiful

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Heartfelt, honest, funny and generally beautiful. A lovely discussion of what it is to live alongside depression.

Heartfelt

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
a poignant and uplifting story of a life with depressio n. very tender, funny and poignant.

a beautiful personal story

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Heartbreaking and a tough listen at times, but beautifully written and wonderfully read, I didn't want it to end.

Wonderful

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Samadder is a very endearing memoirist. He is clearly very successful as a leading actor in a NT play and also as a Guardian writer, but has a refreshingly honest account of how accidental and lucky the experience of success is. Always sort of strange to hear someone so successful talk about their oppressive sense of failure (and a bit annoying if you are less successful - should I be feeling more of a failure than this stage actor and broadsheet journalist feels?) Only bits I struggled with was an occasional very detailed and gory account of his self-harm. All depressions are unique but I suspect there is a lot here that others experiencing depression will relate to. Samadder keeps it just light and whimsical enough that it doesn't feel like you are wadeing through his pain, while it still feels very real.

Well read, very listenable

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
I'm so glad I decided to listen to the audiobook, rather than reading this: it is deeply moving, sometimes very upsetting, and dotted throughout with touches of humour which make it both easier and more painful. The author's voice adds his humanity, his courage, his sadness. This is not a book to listen to whilst driving: it is a book for which to set time aside. It is not a book about depression, but rather an account of the ongoing attention needed by some of us in living life as well as we can, despite what seem like the odds.

Set aside some time and listen to this

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
I loved this book. Rhik Samadder's honesty, sensitivity and ability to delve inside his own life story with humour and generousity leaves you feeling both trusted and inspired - thank you Rhik for telling your crazy story.

Stunning

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Amazing sad, funny, happy, cynical, open description of depression, loving someone with depression and of love in all its imperfection.

Unexpected gem

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
Gut wrenching at times, heart warming at others. I laughed and cried (often at the same time) and was deeply moved by it. Beautifully written and beautifully read.

Brave and moving memoir

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
A beautiful book that is moving, funny and poetic in turns. I highly recommend it.

Wonderful

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
See more reviews