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Dreams from My Mother

By: Dame Elizabeth Anionwu
Narrated by: Dame Elizabeth Anionwu
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Summary

It's 1947, and a sheltered Catholic girl is studying classics at Newnham College, Cambridge. She is the first one in her family to go to university - and then she discovers that she's pregnant. The father is also a student at Cambridge, studying law. And he is Black.

Despite pressure to give up her baby for adoption, the young mother has big dreams for her child's future. Her daughter, Elizabeth, overcomes a background of shame, stigma and discrimination, to become one of the UK's greatest ever nurses and the first ever sickle-cell nurse specialist. Recently named a BBC 100 Women of the Year 2020 and awarded a damehood, Dame Elizabeth Anionwu has continued her work throughout her retirement and recently brought to the nation's attention how COVID-19 has had a devastating effect on Black and Asian communities.

Dreams from My Mother is an inspiring story about childhood, race, identity, family, friendship, hope and what makes us who we are. Ultimately, it is an incredibly moving story of a mother and a daughter separated by society, but united in the dreams they shared for her future.

Previously published as Mixed Blessings from a Cambridge Union, this is a revised and updated edition.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2021 Dame Elizabeth Anionwu (P)2021 Seven Dials
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Critic reviews

"What a page turner of a book! Dame Elizabeth uncovers the layers of her life from a childhood defined by secrets, to discovering the identity of her father, to her political awakening, and her journey to becoming a Black health radical. She uses her 'bellyful of anger' to great effect, highlighting the ethnic health inequalities exposed by sickle cell disease right through to Covid-19. More than anything, her great sense of empathy and fun shine out from the page. I loved it." (Dua Lipa)

"This is a powerful and compelling story of dual heritage, how an Irish girl became a Nigerian woman, and how discovering a true and total sense of identity brought acceptance, peace and joy. This story will inspire many people who have Irish and African (and other) roots and should be read by all who are interested in the history and culture of those lands. It is a unique and deeply personal account of the triumph of character, spirit and endeavour in the face of much adversity and considerable bigotry, beautifully written with a complete absence of bitterness. I felt in equal measure humbled and privileged to read it. I never cry but the concluding reflection on the mother and daughter relationship made me cry unashamedly." (Patrick Gaul, chair, Liverpool Irish Centre)

"What a woman. What a book." (Lemn Sissay Obe, author of My Name Is Why)

What listeners say about Dreams from My Mother

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Brilliant

I can imagine that if I was evading a hard copy I may not have been able to put down, but the Audioable version read by Dame Elizabeth herself was brilliant.

An incredible insight of a girl born out of wedlock to English/Nigerian parents post war with all the turmoil, interlocked with her inspirational nursing career made even more moving as read by Dame Elizabeth herself. throughly recommend.

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Amazing inspirational story

Elizabeth share this deeply personal reflection of her life - it’s a story of triumph over adversity. If you wish to be inspired and see what can be possible this is the book for you. It is also an historic account of life growing up as a dual heritage girl and finding identity & belonging. Dame Elizabeth is a living nursing icon

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Wonderful & thought provoking

Wonderful audiobook read by the author. Dame Elizabeth tells us about her childhood and her journey to becoming the UK's first sickle cell & thalassemia specialist nurse and one of the UK's leading black nurses.

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Book Review

This was particularly lovely hearing Dame Elizabeth read her own story.

The detail is fascinating and it is striking that through the many challenging situations Dame Elizabeth has been through, I found that those people in her life that could have been described with condemnation and bitterness, instead received a rare depth of compassion as Dame Elizabeth explored the circumstances they themselves were in that may have led to their actions.

Would very much recommend. There is so much in this book on so many levels I will be reflecting on it for months to come I'm sure!

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A beautiful read & what an amazing lady.

Wow, what an amazing lady, loved hearing about her career, achievements and the impact that she had on communities as well as the health service. Really enjoyed her openness & insight to her early family life, dual heritage & being a single hardworking parent in London.

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Somewhat dull book that turns a bit racist

This book is very odd. It starts out talking about the author's mother's time at Cambridge University and the circumstances surrounding the author's birth. We learn about the difficulties of single parenthood of a mixed race child at the time which is about what you'd expect back then. The author gets looked after by her grandparents and aunt for a while and has the opportunity to pursue higher education but starts a very fulfilling nursing career instead.

The lack of care in the children's home described early on was pretty horrendous though. Not having enough clean clothes for the children and forcing them to suffer for wetting the bed shows how far treatment of children has progressed and this section was interesting as a historical perspective.

Much of the nursing and health visiting stuff is unremarkable. It is interesting how much easier it was to live a luxurious life as a student nurse back then than nowadays as her time in Paris showed. I can't imagine student nurses would be able to get in quite as much international travel and holidays in the modern era!

The book does eventually drift towards talking about sickle cell disease which I had hoped would feature more. One of the very few mistakes occurs here when at 5:20:40 she says that if the parents were both carriers then the chance of each of their children having sickle cell disease is 25%. I think she meant that for each individual child the chance of having it would be 25%. Editor should have really caught that.

There isn't much meat to the sickle cell aspect of the book. I had assumed the author had made some discoveries in terms of treatment for the disease but it seems most of her work was that of a modern-day influencer raising awareness and funding. She did, however, use that income to set up some screening programs which undoubtedly saved lives and greatly impacted the detection of sickle cell disease in her area and abroad.

Later on the author connects with her Nigerian family and starts to write about how she couldn't understand her mother. It sounds like she visited Nigeria more often than her family in Wolverhampton! It seems unfair that she disliked her mother's inability to provide for her financially when her wealthy father (who got her mother pregnant and said he would marry her before fleeing the country) didn't contribute a penny to her upbringing is accepted with open arms.

Her father had 6 children by 4 different women so this seems to have been somewhat routine for him. Whether this acceptance was classist because of her father's wealth and status in Nigeria compared to her mother's poverty or an inbuilt racism of holding BAME people to a lower standard of responsibility it still leaves one feeling uncomfortable.

On the other hand, I think perhaps being raised without a loving father figure made the author latch onto her father upon reconnection. It does seem odd to change your name to that of your more absentee parent rather than that of the family that raised you otherwise. Her perspective of him may have been influenced by this more than by his race.

The racial aspect is compounded later in the book when the author, much like her mother, falls pregnant to a (married) Nigerian man who doesn't commit to raising the child. Around 8:20:20 the author's Nigerian friends compliment her on becoming pregnant by a black Nigerian and an Igbo one at that but are disappointed that he is not from the correct tribe. It seems like this level of racism is ok because again BAME people are held to a lower standard. It is annoying to hear someone of mixed race infantilise them like this when they should know better.

Near the end of the book we get an overlong segment going on about Mary Seacole. Who is she? Why aren't we taught about her in schools? Etc. Etc. Probably for the same reason we don't hear about famous black plumbers or cobblers. Outside of the nursing field her experiences just aren't that relevant to the modern world. This is taken as racism by the author but I think if you walked up to the average person and asked them to name a famous nurse of any colour, race or creed you'd get no reply. I'd certainly have struggled to name one before reading this.

She also goes on to mention the recent British report saying that there is negligible institutional racism in the UK and immediately countermands this by referencing the New Cross Fire incident of 1981. Going back 40 years to find an example of institutional racism (and a dubious one at that) shows how this author is trapped in the bubble of her youth and sadly hasn't come to grips with the modern world as so many of the boomer generation similarly struggle to do.

This book is also a slightly updated version of Mixed Blessings of a Cambridge Union, also written by the author, but titled in such a way as to attract customers looking for Dreams From My Father by Barack Obama. Considering the author's seeming disapproval of her mother I felt this retitling was less than genuine and perhaps pushed by the publisher.

The narration was good if somewhat slow. I would recommend listening with the speed at least at 1.1x but the pronunciation was flawless.

My last thought is that another review that I read before buying the book said it read like a c.v. The first eight hours or so are nothing like that which left me confused however the end of the book is very much a list of accolades and awards. I can see how upon finishing the book your opinion could be tainted by that last hour or so.

Overall, this book isn't that interesting. The author has had a life well lived but there isn't much substance. Compared to one of my favourite autobiographies, Becoming Johnny Vegas, where you come away with a real understanding of the author and his struggles in life this book seems glossy and a bit surface-level. Once out of childhood the author seems to have run into minimal adversity in life and while that is fantastic for her it isn't great for a narrative. I would recommend if you are interested in nursing or black history in the UK but otherwise give it a miss.

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Reads like a CV

Not what I expected at all. Reads more like a job interview to me. A bit boring, sorry.

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