Pull Me Close
Panic Series, Book 1
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Pull Me Close
Narrated by:
Joe Arden, Aletha George
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Narrated by:
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Joe Arden
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Aletha George
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By:
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Sidney Halston
About this listen
Katherine: I thought I could enjoy a night out like a normal person. I thought I could handle the flashing lights, the pulsing music, the crowded dance floor. I couldn't have been more wrong. After having an anxiety attack and passing out during my sister's engagement party at Panic, I wake up in the arms of the hottest guy I've ever seen. Nick Moreno's no gentleman. But he might just be the man I need to help me take control of my life.
Nick: When I hear there's some random girl passed out in the back room of my family's South Beach nightclub, I'm pissed. My dad's already behind bars and we can't afford any more bad press. But after giving her a lift - literally - back to her apartment, I stop seeing Katherine Wilson as some random girl. She's gorgeous, vulnerable, and braver than she knows. And when we kiss, all I want to do is pull her close and promise that she'll always be safe in my arms.
©2016 Sidney Halston (P)2017 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
Pull me close
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I really liked it
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Beautiful book and deffo recommend. Male narrator is so good.
Super book
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Easy listening
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It was slow paced at first
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It’s fresh and different
Great story!!
Just beautiful
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Pull me close
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Anxiety, panic attacks, fainting, Agoraphobia, PTSD, trauma, nightmares, insomnia, flashbacks, tremors, video call therapy appointments, failing in-person appointments, recovery and regression, character misunderstandings, facing judgment and not being believed and fear. I have never felt so... "Un-alone" is the only word I can come up with right now... It feels like Catherine looked me straight in the eyes and held my hands tightly.
The 1 step forward and 10 steps back became thousands of steps back yet again so I haven't even felt the wind or smelled grass in so long that I'm ashame to say how long. I was officially diagnosed with agoraphobia 5 years ago but it has probably been around more than 9 years ago since it started becoming an obvious problem. Before then it was kind of sneaking up on me without my realising it.
Anyway, my safe space has once again shrunk to the confines of my bedroom only so it's even worse now but your story has reminded me of how strong and relentless I have repeatedly been throughout the years, pushing forward to overcome these illnesses, step by literal step just like Catherine. I was with her every step of the way and through every chapter, memory after memory of my own steps, frustrations, tears and feelings of accomplishments, kept running through my mind so much so that it also helped me to recognise that I had finally given up trying at some point and hadn't even realised it. I hadn't but I do now and it is not me to give up so I'm more grateful than you will ever know.
After finishing this audio book, I was speechless. I know that my disorders aren't uncommon by themselves or even coexisting with one another but the type of panic attacks that Catherine experiences is exactly the same as what I experience. The only difference is that I do not Black out when I faint. I remain concious laying where I've fallen, paralysed, while still panicking on the inside as if I'm trapped inside a mannequin. Even still, I've read that severe forms of panic attacks where you faint, are rare and uncommon so a lot of information out there tells you that although you feel like you are going to faint, you won't and I also experience the more common type of panic attacks as well so I never put two and two together for over a decade.
I was in and out of hospitals for these "fainting attacks" for over 12 years, going through all sorts of physical tests only for them to tell my parents that I was perfectly healthy and they didn't know what could be causing them. All throughout adolescence, I was believed to be a lying teenager who was making up illness to skip school because of it. Only my mother and my younger sister believed me. They had seen it happening and could see instantly that with the cold sweats, the pale face and blue lips, it wasn't something that you could fake.
These "fainting attacks" started at 15 years old and I only discovered what they were from a psychiatric nurse, at yet another assessment to go back into to mental health treatment for other reasons/symptoms, at the age of 27. I am now 31 going on 32.
I've only ever heard of one other account in my life, of similar symptoms of panic attacks like mine from a girl on YouTube and was stunned back then so to listen to an audio book with all the disorders out of most of mine and also the severe panic attacks that are so rare even doctors couldn't figure it out for over a decade, left me absolutely speechless.
Catherine's story and my own have been eerily similar. It's not only just the afflictions, the situations and her day to day but also smaller details such as our ages. It's as if I wrote it myself, about myself and added the positives in life that I hope for but do not yet have. I am not sure what ethnicity she is but I imagined her to be latina like me, only because she seemed to understand Nico's Spanish words. I also have a lot of hair. It's thick and also down to my bottom due to not being able to go out and get a haircut at a salon. I also just trim the ends and hope for the best so some similarities had me smiling and giggling along with Catherine.
I don't expect Catherine's happy ending but I do still expect my own. I will never be "cured" but I know that I can work hard on making things less daunting and not so hard to the point where I will be able to enjoy the things that I used to enjoy, once again.
Thank you for pulling me out of my (sometimes literal 😅) slumber and clearing the fog that I didn't realise I was in. I'm off to work on my baby steps once again but I know that this is probably the only book I will come back to and happily do so to remind me of the strength that us Catherines out there, have inside. I don't reread/relisten books so that should tell you something about my enjoyment of the story besides being able to relate to the main character also.
Really, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, Sidney Halston.
You are an angel. 💖
Love from your real life Catherine, Jei. 🌹
I will never forget this book.
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Pull me close
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Good read
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