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I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki

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I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki

By: Baek Sehee
Narrated by: Jully Lee
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About this listen

Bloomsbury presents I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Sehee, read by Jully Lee.

_______________

THE PHENOMENAL KOREAN BESTSELLER
TRANSLATED BY INTERNATIONAL BOOKER SHORTLISTEE ANTON HUR

'Will strike a chord with anyone who feels that their public life is at odds with how they really feel inside.' – Red

PSYCHIATRIST: So how can I help you?

ME: I don’t know, I’m – what’s the word – depressed? Do I have to go into detail?

Baek Sehee is a successful young social media director at a publishing house when she begins seeing a psychiatrist about her – what to call it? – depression? She feels persistently low, anxious, endlessly self-doubting, but also highly judgemental of others. She hides her feelings well at work and with friends; adept at performing the calmness, even ease, her lifestyle demands. The effort is exhausting, overwhelming, and keeps her from forming deep relationships. This can't be normal.

But if she's so hopeless, why can she always summon a desire for her favourite street food, the hot, spicy rice cake, tteokbokki? Is this just what life is like?

Recording her dialogues with her psychiatrist over a 12-week period, Baek begins to disentangle the feedback loops, knee-jerk reactions and harmful behaviours that keep her locked in a cycle of self-abuse. Part memoir, part self-help book, I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki is a book to keep close and to reach for in times of darkness.

©2018 Baek Sehee (P)2022 Bloomsbury Publishing Plc
Mental Health Mood Disorders Personal Development Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Health Memoir

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All stars
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A good insight of how depression could have deep effects and how wordings like cheer up could create a negative consequence.

Highly recommended

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It was an interesting book, and I related to many of the experiences shared on it.

Interesting

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I’m only on chapter 6 and this book is feeding my soul. It’s completely on the nose, thought provoking and I feel like I understand her. It’s amazing how much you can connect with someone else’s lives experience

Cheapest therapy ever

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conversation between psychologist and author and the experience the author shares was really real and captivating

the dialogue between psychologist and author

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This is a very personal book and not everyone could relate to it but those who can, please understand that you could find this book a bit uncomfortable. I found myself irrationally frustrated with the authors thinking sometimes but looking back at it, it wasn’t the author that made me uncomfortable, it was the fact that I could see myself in her place. I was angry at myself for not being different, not being better… All in all, I believe everyone could enjoy this book and might even benefit from reading about such a private part of someone’s life.

A very honest and open view into something very personal

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Heavy matter simply been simplified. Full of wisdom, every young person should read this book. Great reading voice as well, brought the book to life. Enjoyed the book with tears of realisation. Thank you.

Great reading

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It IS very different. I didn’t really know what to expect. I like that it normalises therapy, and difficult, insightful conversations.

I’m sure it will help some folks get professional help. I enjoyed that it comes from a completely different perspective/paradigm to my own.

I also think listening made it easier - than slogging through the pages. I could do chores as well as focus on the work.

Interesting and will help some

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I enjoyed the performance of it more than the actual text. I think as someone who has been through many therapists in my life this seemed far too easy and effective. I’m glad the author had a relatively easy time understanding and working through her issues, but it didn’t feel very real to me unfortunately. I think it was a very brave book to write, I just don’t think I am the right audience for it.

A bit superficial

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This book is for those who ask themselves, ‘do others also feel that their mind is torturing them every second?’, or for those who want to understand how complicated one’s mind can be when one constantly needs external validation, and on top of it, is extremely empathetic. It is extremely insightful into a young woman’s mind, although of course, not everyone experiences the same challenges. I recognise the signs in many a young person I know, and the psychiatrist does help question certain beliefs. The reflections of the author show her pathway for her to become a better person (in her opinion), which are also useful for those struggling with finding their way in life.
This book showed me how blurry the lines could be between mental health and personality / character, and emotional needs. The challenge for us all is to have as good a mental health as you can have, within the constraints of your own personality, and managing those needs so that they are realistic.

A very interesting insight into a young woman’s mind

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This book should be read in a stable state of mind but I recommend

I felt so seen

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