Old Chile lifts the curtain on one of life’s more delicate adventures: his very own vasectomy, or as he calls it—The Gelding. With plenty of pre-op “research” (read: beers and bad advice), a homegrown shave job, and enough one-liners to keep the surgical staff blushing, Chile turns a nerve-wracking rite of passage into a comedy of errors. From pink Easter egg jokes to post-op lightning bolts, this is a tale of bravery, humility, and exactly two too many cocktails. Buckle up—it’s a cut above the rest.

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Old Chile brings the party—and a handful of .22 bullets—to a not-so-peaceful sixth birthday bash. With tap shoes for Lucy, a bullhorn for Brian, and four shiny cartridges tucked under his tongue, Chile manages to dodge Simon Says, fake-swallow live ammo, and send a roomful of moms into a frenzy. A call to Goose Creek Hospital, a dramatic drive, and a very smug confession later… let’s just say no one blew out more candles than Chile did that day.

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Old Chile takes us back to one fateful Thursday night filled with Groucho Marx, choir practice, and a surprise trip to the emergency bathroom. While Mom and Dad sang hymns, Chile stayed home with his TV-loving grandmother and a junk drawer full of temptation. One pen knife, one overstuffed chair, and one nose later… well, let’s just say Groucho wasn’t the only one delivering sharp punchlines. A bloody mess, a swift handoff, and a closet full of secrets—this one cuts deep (literally).

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